Relationships are funny. Falling in love is funny. So funny it could jerk out tears out of them ducts.
Two people could be talking face to face and yet still have some miscommunication. The same two people could be talking of one and the same subject and yet one could have no idea as to what the other is trying to say. Person # 1 could be saying one thing but Person #2 could be hearing another thing depending on what he wants to hear. Person # 1 could be saying one thing and yet feel the opposite of what he's saying. Person # 1 could be saying what he truly means to say but Person # 2 wanted to believe that Person # 1 was just saying the exact opposite of what he feels. Person # 1 may really feel one thing but then just lacks the courage to voice it out or act it out. Person # 1 may just be seeing things differently from how things really are. Person # 1 may have really seen the real thing but is just convincing himself it's not the real deal. Person # 1 may have really seen the real thing but is just so not interested to pry on that real deal. This hurts.
Or. One could look one thing and yet really feel differently. I've been told of this a number of times already...I have an expressive face and yet sometimes what's written on my face is so just not what I feel.
OK, back to rantings.
When do you draw the line of liking someone and loving someone?
Loving someone and letting that someone know about how you feel even though it may be a one-way street, is like standing naked in front of that other person. It's like you're stripping yourself bare and making yourself vulnerable in front of that other person. If only you could choose right. Fall for the right one. One who would understand how you feel.
And, is there any manual and on job training of loving someone? Just so you know what to do and what to say? Just so you know when to sail on? Just so you know how to make him feel loved? Just so you know how NOT to make him feel unloved or worse smothered with your love.
Do you have to give up feeling for someone even though you really haven't confirmed with that person yet how that person feels for you? Well, I guess, it only sums up to two: either you go and stand naked in front of that special person or you can just walk away knowing that you might be giving up something that could really be beautiful...
Friday, 18 April 2008
Monday, 14 April 2008
twists of fate
Whew! The day's been definitely full of twists and turns; one that's emotion-filled and would leave your head reeling and murky.
As my next forecasted project's schedule is still not fixed, it was decided that I have to go back to Manila for the mean time and be back here in Japan when we need to start the new project. This, if you can imagine, would create a big hassle and much complication for an overseas assignee especially when your hometown is an hour and half plane ride away from your workplace in Manila and that the possible interval between projects could only be one week. Coupled with this crazy arrangement was that my final workload in my current project is one which I find to be always a challenge everytime I get to design it. These made me really apprehensive as to what would be the best course of action. But what's weighing things down really is the fact that I'll be saying goodbye to those which I've grown fond of over the past year...
But fortunately, news travels fast and thanks to friends who helped in my adoption advertisements (^_^), I was transferred to another project which would serve as my transition project. An answered prayer, hopefully. =)
Anyways, today's hubbub ended with a yakitori dinner with Nagano-san, Kitty and Keitaro. My fave "Amo" (level with SL nga pala) advised us that we should take care of those younger than us and try to help mold them into being better Process engineers. Whew, a tall order it is as i've yet to scale a number of "mountains" to be a good Process engineer myself. But I sure do hope that even in my own small way, I could help with the molding..*_*
As my next forecasted project's schedule is still not fixed, it was decided that I have to go back to Manila for the mean time and be back here in Japan when we need to start the new project. This, if you can imagine, would create a big hassle and much complication for an overseas assignee especially when your hometown is an hour and half plane ride away from your workplace in Manila and that the possible interval between projects could only be one week. Coupled with this crazy arrangement was that my final workload in my current project is one which I find to be always a challenge everytime I get to design it. These made me really apprehensive as to what would be the best course of action. But what's weighing things down really is the fact that I'll be saying goodbye to those which I've grown fond of over the past year...
But fortunately, news travels fast and thanks to friends who helped in my adoption advertisements (^_^), I was transferred to another project which would serve as my transition project. An answered prayer, hopefully. =)
Anyways, today's hubbub ended with a yakitori dinner with Nagano-san, Kitty and Keitaro. My fave "Amo" (level with SL nga pala) advised us that we should take care of those younger than us and try to help mold them into being better Process engineers. Whew, a tall order it is as i've yet to scale a number of "mountains" to be a good Process engineer myself. But I sure do hope that even in my own small way, I could help with the molding..*_*
Thursday, 10 April 2008
floating
For the first time since January, I was busy with work today. I was trying to hurry and get the P&IDs done so I could send them to our Manila office this evening and go home as early as I can as I haven't been able to start packing yet.
Around 8, I was nearly done with the finishing touches when BA pulled the chair of the desk beside me and told me that he has a big surprise for me.
Our additional unit got cancelled.
It seemed that both competing contractors' schedule proposal didn't fit with the Client's EPC plans so the additional unit would just have to be done FEED-EPC wise in three-months' time when the final contractor has been decided already.
Hence, leaving me a floating engineer for now. I wonder what lies for me come Monday. woohoo quite scary. Will I be going back to Pinas in a few weeks' time?
Oh well, for now though, I just have to enjoy my friends' company on our Kansai Area trip. So looking forward to this one....
Around 8, I was nearly done with the finishing touches when BA pulled the chair of the desk beside me and told me that he has a big surprise for me.
Our additional unit got cancelled.
It seemed that both competing contractors' schedule proposal didn't fit with the Client's EPC plans so the additional unit would just have to be done FEED-EPC wise in three-months' time when the final contractor has been decided already.
Hence, leaving me a floating engineer for now. I wonder what lies for me come Monday. woohoo quite scary. Will I be going back to Pinas in a few weeks' time?
Oh well, for now though, I just have to enjoy my friends' company on our Kansai Area trip. So looking forward to this one....
Tuesday, 1 April 2008
on sakura
Much as I tried to wake up early to have a leisurely stroll at sakura-dori in MM21 (and perhaps have a quick bite whilst seated beneath one of them sakura trees), I was only able to go out my flat at 8:40am. But it's not too bad I think since it's a few minutes earlier than usual. Hence, I still had my morning walk at Sakura dori.
Ooooohmmmm!! sakura! i so love them. They feel almost like heaven (for me at least).
Ooooohmmmm!! sakura! i so love them. They feel almost like heaven (for me at least).
Monday, 2 July 2007
The Greatest Love of All
Was listening to Lea's version of this song; bringing back childhood memories and a teeny weeny panghihinayang that my parents and I didn't have a record of how I sang this song back then. Anyways, I just realized again how beautiful this song is....
------
I believe that children are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter
remind us how we used to be
Everybody's searching for a hero
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone who fulfilled my needs
A lonely place to be
And so I learned to depend on me
I decided long ago,
never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I lived as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all
I believe that children are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter
remind us how we used to be
I decided long ago,
never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I lived as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all
And if by chance,
that special place
That you've been dreaming of
Leads you to a lonely place
Find your strength in love
------
I believe that children are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter
remind us how we used to be
Everybody's searching for a hero
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone who fulfilled my needs
A lonely place to be
And so I learned to depend on me
I decided long ago,
never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I lived as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all
I believe that children are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter
remind us how we used to be
I decided long ago,
never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I lived as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all
And if by chance,
that special place
That you've been dreaming of
Leads you to a lonely place
Find your strength in love
Friday, 22 June 2007
Rainy days and Junes
I hate Junes.
It always is rainy in June; be it in the Philippines, Singapore or Japan. And somehow, the drizzle outside gets its way inside; the gloom inside, a reflection of the outside....or is it the other way around?
The skies last week were lovely in that I keep on looking outside and kept on blabbering what a romantic and happy sky it was. And yes, somehow, those skies were reflections of what were inside.
But this week, or at least late this week, 'tis somewhat different....
By the minute, it was getting darker outside as it was on the inside. No, it seemed that outside was a brighter mirror image compared to the inside. And to point the comparison out loud in a trying-to-be-happy-but-definitely-sad-voice just to ease the tension did not help in keeping my emotions in tight rein (hidoi yo...). Rather, it added to the burning in my eyes. Good thing I can still turn away to hide. But alas, I think I was not able to hide.
Later, somehow, everybody seems nicer. Everybody seemed bouyant. A bouyancy that is so fake it makes you want to cry some more. And you can see that on everybody's eyes is some shadow that everybody tries to quell and shut in tight.
I hate Junes. ........
I know though that I should just think of the positive things that this outset has created....
...and think that on a June, I was conceived. Now, with that in my mind, I-should-love-Junes.
It still is dark outside. But at least now, I could see colors in it... hinting of a sunshiny tomorrow....
--------
This bleak tidings per se is a shock in itself. But it was truly a twofold shock for me. I feel like i've been doused with a bucketful of cold freezing water... with my skin all bumpy. Cause how come just when I thought of something inconceivable last night, that very inconceivable thing is in our midst today.... leaving some part of me thinking that had I only not thought about it, there might be some chance that we wouldnt have this. A friend said that if my mindpower is that strong, then I should work on thinking that everything will work out right and that it is for the best.
Oh how I truly hope and pray that it be so....
It always is rainy in June; be it in the Philippines, Singapore or Japan. And somehow, the drizzle outside gets its way inside; the gloom inside, a reflection of the outside....or is it the other way around?
The skies last week were lovely in that I keep on looking outside and kept on blabbering what a romantic and happy sky it was. And yes, somehow, those skies were reflections of what were inside.
But this week, or at least late this week, 'tis somewhat different....
By the minute, it was getting darker outside as it was on the inside. No, it seemed that outside was a brighter mirror image compared to the inside. And to point the comparison out loud in a trying-to-be-happy-but-definitely-sad-voice just to ease the tension did not help in keeping my emotions in tight rein (hidoi yo...). Rather, it added to the burning in my eyes. Good thing I can still turn away to hide. But alas, I think I was not able to hide.
Later, somehow, everybody seems nicer. Everybody seemed bouyant. A bouyancy that is so fake it makes you want to cry some more. And you can see that on everybody's eyes is some shadow that everybody tries to quell and shut in tight.
I hate Junes. ........
I know though that I should just think of the positive things that this outset has created....
...and think that on a June, I was conceived. Now, with that in my mind, I-should-love-Junes.
It still is dark outside. But at least now, I could see colors in it... hinting of a sunshiny tomorrow....
--------
This bleak tidings per se is a shock in itself. But it was truly a twofold shock for me. I feel like i've been doused with a bucketful of cold freezing water... with my skin all bumpy. Cause how come just when I thought of something inconceivable last night, that very inconceivable thing is in our midst today.... leaving some part of me thinking that had I only not thought about it, there might be some chance that we wouldnt have this. A friend said that if my mindpower is that strong, then I should work on thinking that everything will work out right and that it is for the best.
Oh how I truly hope and pray that it be so....
Saturday, 16 June 2007
Omohide Poro poro (Only yesterday)
It sounded like a song my grandmother would sing to me but I like the lyrics...and the setting...
Some say love, it is a river
that drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor
that leaves your soul to bleed
Some say love, it is a hunger
an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower
and you its only seed.
It's the heart, afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance
It's the dream, afraid of waking
that never takes a chance.
It's the one who won't be taken
who cannot seem to give.
And the soul, afraid of dyin'
that never learns to live
When the night has been too lonely
and the road has been too long
and you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter
far beneath the bitter snows
lies the seed, that with the sun's love
in the spring becomes the rose....
Some say love, it is a river
that drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor
that leaves your soul to bleed
Some say love, it is a hunger
an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower
and you its only seed.
It's the heart, afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance
It's the dream, afraid of waking
that never takes a chance.
It's the one who won't be taken
who cannot seem to give.
And the soul, afraid of dyin'
that never learns to live
When the night has been too lonely
and the road has been too long
and you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter
far beneath the bitter snows
lies the seed, that with the sun's love
in the spring becomes the rose....
Wednesday, 16 May 2007
My Girl
My favorite scene........
Yoo Rin was on the elevator on her way down whilst Gong Chan was waiting for the same lift.
Opening and closing his cp with Yoo rin's prank picture as screensaver whilst saying in an agonized half-whisper:
"I'll let her go"
"I won't let her go"
"I have to let her go"
"I can't let her go"
Hearing the lift's "ding", he put down his cellphone and with head still bent, said
"I can let her go".
Raising his head and seeing Yoorin beyond the lift's glass doors,
"I don't...want to let her go."
Yoo Rin was on the elevator on her way down whilst Gong Chan was waiting for the same lift.
Opening and closing his cp with Yoo rin's prank picture as screensaver whilst saying in an agonized half-whisper:
"I'll let her go"
"I won't let her go"
"I have to let her go"
"I can't let her go"
Hearing the lift's "ding", he put down his cellphone and with head still bent, said
"I can let her go".
Raising his head and seeing Yoorin beyond the lift's glass doors,
"I don't...want to let her go."
Saturday, 5 May 2007
thoughts from "Long Vacation"
- "if you're unhappy being single, how can you be happy when you're with someone?"
so i guess you have to be really happy as an individual and not rely your happiness on somebody else..cause if you haven't found happiness while being single, more likely you couldn't find happiness neither as a partner..
- "if you like it, if you really love it, you have to live through it even during painful times"
loving something/someone doesn't guarantee that you'll be happy always. pain and suffering always comes with loving. so if you really love someone, you have to fight for it, never letting go and see your love to the very end even though it hurts. there's no place for escapism nor cowardice if you truly love someone...
so i guess you have to be really happy as an individual and not rely your happiness on somebody else..cause if you haven't found happiness while being single, more likely you couldn't find happiness neither as a partner..
- "if you like it, if you really love it, you have to live through it even during painful times"
loving something/someone doesn't guarantee that you'll be happy always. pain and suffering always comes with loving. so if you really love someone, you have to fight for it, never letting go and see your love to the very end even though it hurts. there's no place for escapism nor cowardice if you truly love someone...
Monday, 23 April 2007
My Usual Workday Morning
'Cause of the self-declared holiday incident last time, I now keep two alarm clocks - my cp by my side and my desk clock on my table.
As the desk clock rings at 6:30, I force myself to sit on my bed to turn it off, turn on the heater, turn on the tv, stare at the newscasters for a while and on the tv' digital clock that usually shows it's just 6:10AM, then i flop my head on my pillow again and burrow between my thick sheets as I try to keep the cold out. MMMMM! it's so good to sleep when it's cold...Sometimes, when I particularly dread going to the office, I'd flop back to my sheets with a groan and moan. At 6:30 (20 min after), my cp would ring to the tune of "First time" and I'd put it to snooze...snooze again when it rings after 10 min...and snooze again...usually on the 4th snooze, I force myself to get up as the song gets nauseating already..hehe..and the tv's getting loud already. Then i'd get up and stare at the tv again. Sometimes when the tv's digital clock says it's not 7 yet, I'd flop back on my bed again and try to catch some 5 min sleep.
Like a zombie, i'd start cooking my bento for lunch and if the dish would permit it, i'd snatch some 10-min sleep again. When the tv clock says 7:30 though, I have to hurry to take a bath so as to get to the office just in time. I could actually go to the office at 10 as flexy time's already applicable to us but old J habit makes me feel guilty to come to the office so late so I still take the effort to wake up early.
E-v-e-r-y-d-a-y, it's like this....sluggish sluggish...No sunshine anymore...:(
As the desk clock rings at 6:30, I force myself to sit on my bed to turn it off, turn on the heater, turn on the tv, stare at the newscasters for a while and on the tv' digital clock that usually shows it's just 6:10AM, then i flop my head on my pillow again and burrow between my thick sheets as I try to keep the cold out. MMMMM! it's so good to sleep when it's cold...Sometimes, when I particularly dread going to the office, I'd flop back to my sheets with a groan and moan. At 6:30 (20 min after), my cp would ring to the tune of "First time" and I'd put it to snooze...snooze again when it rings after 10 min...and snooze again...usually on the 4th snooze, I force myself to get up as the song gets nauseating already..hehe..and the tv's getting loud already. Then i'd get up and stare at the tv again. Sometimes when the tv's digital clock says it's not 7 yet, I'd flop back on my bed again and try to catch some 5 min sleep.
Like a zombie, i'd start cooking my bento for lunch and if the dish would permit it, i'd snatch some 10-min sleep again. When the tv clock says 7:30 though, I have to hurry to take a bath so as to get to the office just in time. I could actually go to the office at 10 as flexy time's already applicable to us but old J habit makes me feel guilty to come to the office so late so I still take the effort to wake up early.
E-v-e-r-y-d-a-y, it's like this....sluggish sluggish...No sunshine anymore...:(
Sunday, 22 April 2007
My Abode
Having had seen the other accommodations, I couldn't really complain anymore with my dorm. Albeit lately, I've been considering it as like a beacon to me every time I go home and see it aglow in shades of brown and gold due to the lighting. It being new and pretty, one would just have to ignore the lack of cabinet and its apparent thin walls and partitions (i assume). You could actually hear talking and laughter at the other end of the wall, though you should have some powerful hearing aid to get to hear what they're talking about. But you could actually hear and sing along when some neighbor's belting her heart out. Which tells me to be careful in belting out, myself..hihihi...
This evening, I was cleaning my toilet (have separate bathroom and toilet) when I heard the sound of some trickling water. It sounds like someone urinating (pardon me) but it wasnt me and I thought it absurd if it's coming from the toilet directly above me - it sounded quite clear, you see. Then, much to my chagrin, I heard the flush of the toilet bowl above. Sniff sniff. With creased forehead, brows furrowed worryingly, I stared at the ceiling and imagined a horrifying scene of the ceiling caving in. Horrendous!!
This evening, I was cleaning my toilet (have separate bathroom and toilet) when I heard the sound of some trickling water. It sounds like someone urinating (pardon me) but it wasnt me and I thought it absurd if it's coming from the toilet directly above me - it sounded quite clear, you see. Then, much to my chagrin, I heard the flush of the toilet bowl above. Sniff sniff. With creased forehead, brows furrowed worryingly, I stared at the ceiling and imagined a horrifying scene of the ceiling caving in. Horrendous!!
Friday, 13 April 2007
Another first!
Had another first in Japan today! Had my tooth extracted just this evening.
I actually planned to have this 3rd molar for root canal last Wednesday but the dentist didn't recommend it as he said my 3rd molar was needless as I have no lower 3rd molar and hence I have no use for it in chewing food. Poor 3rd molar, no partner for life.....hehe..
He also recommended that it be done away with as it would only cause problems for my other teeth in the future. But as I wouldn't want to decide right there and then to have my tooth extracted, I asked for another appointment. After all, you couldnt bring back your tooth once it's extracted. Another appointment though means another expenses..Oh well.
My dentist was really quite nice actually. My heart aches for him as he really have difficulty with English; he talks to me in haltering, clipped and robotlike phrases. Sometimes he has to puff up his chest just to aid him in expressing what he wants to tell me. But kudos to him though!.He-was-really-very-patient with me. See, I have a quite low threshold for pain so I find myself raising my left hand every now and then to tell him that the operation's getting too painful for me to bear. He has to give me anesthesia twice as the first one wasn't quite effective for me. And much as I tried to control it, my tears continued to stream down my temples the whole duration of the extraction. The whole operation though just took 45 min but I feel like it was too long for comfort for me. We have to take a break every one or two pulls to regain my composure and to wipe away my tears (blush). I was soo weak-kneed after the operation and I was shaking all over - most probably from the fear..hehe. Being a true Japanese, my dentist took the trouble though to visit me (just before seeing his next patient) in the reception area, as I waited for my medicine to take home with me, to tell me to take care in going home as he can see that I was shaking.
He must have thought me weird though when I asked for my tooth to take home with me. Just an hour ago, I took a picture of it to show Mama during our chat and alas, it was the last picture that my 3-year-old camera made. For some reason, my camera just broke down...wahhhh!!..=(
Hmmmm...could it be my loose tooth's bad luck? Gotta get rid of it soon.
And yeah!! Martian just came back from Thailand and gave me a nice nice guy Thai doll!! the second male doll in my collection it is. The first was the cowboy Paige gave me last Christmas. Now, suddenly I missed those two cowboy dolls...
I actually planned to have this 3rd molar for root canal last Wednesday but the dentist didn't recommend it as he said my 3rd molar was needless as I have no lower 3rd molar and hence I have no use for it in chewing food. Poor 3rd molar, no partner for life.....hehe..
He also recommended that it be done away with as it would only cause problems for my other teeth in the future. But as I wouldn't want to decide right there and then to have my tooth extracted, I asked for another appointment. After all, you couldnt bring back your tooth once it's extracted. Another appointment though means another expenses..Oh well.
My dentist was really quite nice actually. My heart aches for him as he really have difficulty with English; he talks to me in haltering, clipped and robotlike phrases. Sometimes he has to puff up his chest just to aid him in expressing what he wants to tell me. But kudos to him though!.He-was-really-very-patient with me. See, I have a quite low threshold for pain so I find myself raising my left hand every now and then to tell him that the operation's getting too painful for me to bear. He has to give me anesthesia twice as the first one wasn't quite effective for me. And much as I tried to control it, my tears continued to stream down my temples the whole duration of the extraction. The whole operation though just took 45 min but I feel like it was too long for comfort for me. We have to take a break every one or two pulls to regain my composure and to wipe away my tears (blush). I was soo weak-kneed after the operation and I was shaking all over - most probably from the fear..hehe. Being a true Japanese, my dentist took the trouble though to visit me (just before seeing his next patient) in the reception area, as I waited for my medicine to take home with me, to tell me to take care in going home as he can see that I was shaking.
He must have thought me weird though when I asked for my tooth to take home with me. Just an hour ago, I took a picture of it to show Mama during our chat and alas, it was the last picture that my 3-year-old camera made. For some reason, my camera just broke down...wahhhh!!..=(
Hmmmm...could it be my loose tooth's bad luck? Gotta get rid of it soon.
And yeah!! Martian just came back from Thailand and gave me a nice nice guy Thai doll!! the second male doll in my collection it is. The first was the cowboy Paige gave me last Christmas. Now, suddenly I missed those two cowboy dolls...
Thursday, 12 April 2007
one more on repeat mode!
Waiting for Love
Was it something in the rain,
Or a chance of love again
That made me explain
The secrets of my soul
I guess I'm only needing
Someone to hold
But I was gone without a trace,
And the rain blew away...
And it seems I've spent my whole life
Waiting for love
And when it comes,
I always run away...
Was it something on a dream
That touch my memory
Or a picture I didn't know I've seen
That made me stop and stare
And then I lost him
If he was ever there
Cause I'm afraid of being close
But I need to be the most...
And it seems I've spent my whole life
Waiting for love
And when it comes,
I always run away...
Cause I'm afraid of being close
Where I need to be the most...
And it seems I've spent my whole life
Waiting for love
And when it comes,
I always run away...
And i'm afraid i'll spend my whole life
waiting for love
Till my last day
has come to run away
And it seems
i'll spend my whole life
waiting for love....................
Was it something in the rain,
Or a chance of love again
That made me explain
The secrets of my soul
I guess I'm only needing
Someone to hold
But I was gone without a trace,
And the rain blew away...
And it seems I've spent my whole life
Waiting for love
And when it comes,
I always run away...
Was it something on a dream
That touch my memory
Or a picture I didn't know I've seen
That made me stop and stare
And then I lost him
If he was ever there
Cause I'm afraid of being close
But I need to be the most...
And it seems I've spent my whole life
Waiting for love
And when it comes,
I always run away...
Cause I'm afraid of being close
Where I need to be the most...
And it seems I've spent my whole life
Waiting for love
And when it comes,
I always run away...
And i'm afraid i'll spend my whole life
waiting for love
Till my last day
has come to run away
And it seems
i'll spend my whole life
waiting for love....................
on repeat mode...
...in my player.
Bridges
I have crossed a thousand bridges
in my search for something real.
There were great suspension bridges,
made like spiderwebs of steel.
There were tiny wooden trestles,
and there were bridges made of stone.
I have always been a stranger
and I've always been alone.
There's a bridge to tomorrow,
there's a bridge from the past.
There's a bridge made of sorrow
that I pray will not last.
There's a bridge made of colors
in the sky high above
and I think that there must be
bridges made out of love.
I can see him in the distance
on the river's other shore,
and his hands reach out in longing
as my own have done before.
And I call across to tell him
where I believe the bridge must lie,
and I'll find it,
yes, I'll find it,
if I search until I die.
When the bridge is between us,
we'll have nothing to fear.
We will run through the sunlight
and you'll meet me halfway.
There's a bridge made of colors
in the sky high above
and I'm certain that somewhere
there's a bridge made of love
Bridges
I have crossed a thousand bridges
in my search for something real.
There were great suspension bridges,
made like spiderwebs of steel.
There were tiny wooden trestles,
and there were bridges made of stone.
I have always been a stranger
and I've always been alone.
There's a bridge to tomorrow,
there's a bridge from the past.
There's a bridge made of sorrow
that I pray will not last.
There's a bridge made of colors
in the sky high above
and I think that there must be
bridges made out of love.
I can see him in the distance
on the river's other shore,
and his hands reach out in longing
as my own have done before.
And I call across to tell him
where I believe the bridge must lie,
and I'll find it,
yes, I'll find it,
if I search until I die.
When the bridge is between us,
we'll have nothing to fear.
We will run through the sunlight
and you'll meet me halfway.
There's a bridge made of colors
in the sky high above
and I'm certain that somewhere
there's a bridge made of love
Saturday, 7 April 2007
Indulge
MMmmmm..A nice, productive and peaceful day it was.
I first headed off to Zoff's at More's to buy a new pair of eyeglasses. The one i bought just before going to Japan was too narrow for comfort; straining my eyes more rather than protecting my eyesight. So now I got me-self a new wide-view glasses that's just perfect for my quite-larger-than-usual eyes, hehehe..Good thing a jap colleague knows this affordable optical shop so it's still within my budget limits. Was glad too for the kinda-different experience to have my eyes tested here in Japan.
As it would only take about an hour to wait for my glasses, I walked around Yokohama while I waited. I got my second "first-time" for the day in Takashimaya as the Clinique lady made me up. At first I held my breath as she applied rouge on my lips till (I believe) I almost turned blue...hahaha..Man, getting made up by a flawless lady makes one really self-conscious...hehehe..Anyways, thanks Vanz, Sugar Bean was really pretty! Got myself one already..=)
I then headed off to Negishi-Shinrin Park for a late lunch under the sakura. So there I was, with a bento box on my knees and snuggled on my pretty-100 yen-Tinker bell picnic mat, sprawled on the ground that was lightly matted with fallen sakura in the midst of the sakura trees. I passed the next couple of hours reading with my back against the sakura tree. It was lovely to see the cherry blossoms as they fell and blown away by the wind; 'twas like seeing pink snowflakes. Lovely.
I was actually hesitant to go and spend the afternoon alone in Negishi knowing that there'd be lots of people around; laughing with their own groups. I was a bit afraid that i'd feel lonely and instead of passing a peaceful afternoon, I'd pass the rest of the day depressed. But my worries were unfounded as I later realized. On my little nook at the brow of the hill, I gazed about me as the sakura fell. And despite all the troubles that kept on bugging me lately, I was at peace, so at ease and very much contented. A thought crossed my mind. If parallelism could have it's way, then maybe, I shouldn't be too afraid of spending the rest of my life alone. Maybe, just maybe, the one thing im so afraid of would turn out to be peaceful and heavenly after all......
...my little peace of heaven today...
I first headed off to Zoff's at More's to buy a new pair of eyeglasses. The one i bought just before going to Japan was too narrow for comfort; straining my eyes more rather than protecting my eyesight. So now I got me-self a new wide-view glasses that's just perfect for my quite-larger-than-usual eyes, hehehe..Good thing a jap colleague knows this affordable optical shop so it's still within my budget limits. Was glad too for the kinda-different experience to have my eyes tested here in Japan.
As it would only take about an hour to wait for my glasses, I walked around Yokohama while I waited. I got my second "first-time" for the day in Takashimaya as the Clinique lady made me up. At first I held my breath as she applied rouge on my lips till (I believe) I almost turned blue...hahaha..Man, getting made up by a flawless lady makes one really self-conscious...hehehe..Anyways, thanks Vanz, Sugar Bean was really pretty! Got myself one already..=)
I then headed off to Negishi-Shinrin Park for a late lunch under the sakura. So there I was, with a bento box on my knees and snuggled on my pretty-100 yen-Tinker bell picnic mat, sprawled on the ground that was lightly matted with fallen sakura in the midst of the sakura trees. I passed the next couple of hours reading with my back against the sakura tree. It was lovely to see the cherry blossoms as they fell and blown away by the wind; 'twas like seeing pink snowflakes. Lovely.
I was actually hesitant to go and spend the afternoon alone in Negishi knowing that there'd be lots of people around; laughing with their own groups. I was a bit afraid that i'd feel lonely and instead of passing a peaceful afternoon, I'd pass the rest of the day depressed. But my worries were unfounded as I later realized. On my little nook at the brow of the hill, I gazed about me as the sakura fell. And despite all the troubles that kept on bugging me lately, I was at peace, so at ease and very much contented. A thought crossed my mind. If parallelism could have it's way, then maybe, I shouldn't be too afraid of spending the rest of my life alone. Maybe, just maybe, the one thing im so afraid of would turn out to be peaceful and heavenly after all......
...my little peace of heaven today...
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